LEAVING SYDNEY FOR QLD

It's been a well waited holiday. After struggling so hard this year not to hit Flight Centre to book a trip to Turkey & Greece, I managed to survive the year and actually have my first winter in 3 years. It was hard, it was painful but there was light at the end of the tunnel my friend and no I'm not talking about the Cross City Tunnel!

Doing the usual and randomly booking without getting leave I soon realised once I asked my boss for leave that I had booked the trip during our once a year regional team conference. Stressing he wasn't going to approve my leave I was lucky enough to get him to sign the leave form.

Rushing from the conference to the airport was another matter. Usually I'm huffing and puffing to get to the airport to quickly check in, go through security check etc. This time round I rocked up to the aiport before 5pm for a 7:40pm flight.

I kissed my parents goodbye as I calmly strolled into the airport with my luggage ready to battle the aiport after a good 9 months. The airport was quite packed when I arrived. The Virgin line practically ended in the toilets. Thank god I was early.

I spent the next 40 minutes sitting there watching people rushing in and out. It's actually quite funny when you watch these people. Some people are complete lunatics when they arrive to the airport others are quite calm. I sat down outside of Jetstar trying to decide if I should walk over to the coffee shop to buy a coffee. I was seriously dead tired. I spent half the night packing and when I finally did get to bed I would wake up and remember something I forgot to pack. I dont understand why I was stressing about the packing as I was only going to the Gold Coast and not to Europe. I suppose the thing is if I was going to Europe I would leave half of this shit behind as I need the luggage space.

I turned to my right to see a woman with a pram parking herself smack bang next to me. The first thought I got was "SHIT". This kid's going to start crying and I'm going to have to get up amd move. I love kids but seriously lately I have become so impatient that I can't handle hearing a baby cry. Luckily this kid was so cute and cheerful. He didnt make a sound the entire time he was sitting next to me.

While admiring all this around me I get a phone call with Oishii screaming down the phone "Where are you". Even though I stated I was outside Jetstar for some reason she was searching for me outside of the coffee shop. But then again she probably knew I needed a coffee by this stage. Within minutes we were sitting there thinking "Were going on holidays again". What the hell were we thinking.

It's funny as the night before I was actually thinking we decided not to do Europe this year to save money but instead we decided to do little trips to keep us in the country. Hence we had a holiday every 3 months. It kicked off with Hunter Valley in March, followed by Blue Mountains in June and now Gold Coast in September. This was getting ridiculous. We had spent enough money on these little trips to buy a plane ticket to Turkey.

By this time we realised we can check in. We walked over to our line and handed our bags over. I was quite shocked when I realised I had packed 19kgs of luggage. Oishii's was close to 16kgs. We decided to skip the whole coffee thing as we were hungry and there was apparently a new food court inside.

We strolled through security check and headed to the food court. We both wanted Red Rooster but decided to do a quick lap around the food court for the sake of it. This is when I walked past "Mamma Leonie's" and practically chocked on the garlic I breathed in. They had practically wiped their benches in garlic so the smell can spread.

We checked out the kebab shop before heading to the red rooster line. We were stuck behind a huge queue where I questioned if all these people need to have red rooster or not. Waiting in line I was getting drawn to Mama Leonie's smell.

We quickly ate our food before we hit the shops. Not that I wanted to buy anything but I really wanted to check the shops out. I demanded we go into a CD shop when Oishii kept screaming in my ear "Don't buy anything". Who the hell tells me not to buy anything in a CD shop? Not that I would buy anything but I don't need to be told not to.

I walk out empty handed and we reach our boarding gate. We sit down and as I get up to go to the toilet to pee they annouce that we are boarding. Talk about great timing. The first colour is called to the left hand side where about 3 people walk to and the remainder of us wait to be boarded.

We walk onto the plane and I think this is my first time doing all of this calmly and not pushing people over. We find our seats and collapse into them when we spot this woman settling herself next to us. The minute this woman sat down next to me she pulled out her mobile and started making calls. This is when I freak out. I have enough fears of flying and the last thing I need is this bitch causing an accident.

She calls her friend trying to question the bus timetables when all she really wanted was to get a free lift off her friend. The thing was this wasn't a two second conversation. She kept talking and talking while the hostesses walked past her. I was ready to grab the phone off her and throw it off the plane if she didn't get off. Luckily she ended the conversation and I was calm. This is before she decided to make another call. Who the hell goes on a plane to make a million and one calls. Turn that bloody phone off woman.

Finally the bitch turns her phone off and leans over to tell her daughter Kylie on the other side something. The plane takes off and she pulls out this book to read. During take off all the lights on the plane were turned off and if you wanted to read you had to turn the reading light on. So the bitch turns on her reading light when it comes smack bang into my eye spending me blind. At first she thought she some how turned on my light as it was in my eye and not on her book until she realised that the light was pointing in the wrong direction.

She proceeds to stand to push the light into her direction when she asks me to help her. So the both of us are trying to get this reading light to turn in her direction when I practically pull the light out of the hole. We decide to leave it as it is. We both sit back down when she decides to slam her book onto my side to get the light. For fucks sake do I look like a coffee table to you woman. Why do I have to put up with this shit. It's an hour flight, do you reading later.

Meanwhile some baby in the back starts to cry to add to the frustration. This is the whole NY trip again. Oishii keeps trying to look back for the baby as she's convinced the parents are trying to strangled their own kid and that's why the baby is crying. Between the reading bitch, the baby and Oishii's predictions in my ear I was ready to strangle someone myself.

The plane lands and I'm ready to push whoever to get off the flight. Meanwhile I noticed on the bitch's bag that she's from Hunter's Hill. She from now on she's labelled the bitch from Hunters Hill!