The 8 hour Rhodes walking marathon

We stroll towards Rhodes town with a map in our hand. Not before we stop at an ATM because lunch sucked up all our money. We find ourselves standing outside the Old town, with various cameras in our hands. It's random photos of everything and anything. I realise that I actually like Rhodes. It almost reminds me of Turkey some how.

While taking photos of Old town this couple ask if we can take their photo. So i manage to grab a snap shot of them with Old town behind them.

We walk into Old town and this place is actually quite amazing. It's in between the walls and its a whole new world in here. However to our dislike the ground we walk on isn't exactly comfortable.

The Blood Bracelet

While walking inside we spot a jewellery store which we enter into. I spot a really noice bracelet for myself only to discover it's too big for my tiny wrist. The sales assistant offers to shorten the bracelet for me while we wait. I'm quite excited as I'm looking forward to wearing it.

While waiting for her to fix my bracelet we witness her cutting herself with the pliers. She starts bleeding like no tomorrow all over my bracelet. To my dislike I feel disgusted with the situation. She fetches for a tissue to wrap around her finger and wipes the blood off my bracelet like nothing has happened. She finishes shorting the bracelet and hands it over to me. Feeling too embarrass not to accept, I reach out and take the bracelet. Hence the Blood bracelet has been cursed. I have this woman's blood. Her blood today, yours tomorrow...

Moral of the story - I can't even buy a bracelet without getting someone's blood on it!

Walking in the Old town, we are mistaken for Italians. So we pass as italians - Interesting... Only If they knew I was a Turk!

It suddenly occurs to me I need to pee. Hence the search for a toilet starts. We race around looking when we notice a ticket booth. We plan that if we enter inside that there must be a toilet we can use. We have no idea what this place is. We line up in this huge queue to get tickets. We pull out our expired student cards to obtain a discount. When reaching the top of the queue we realise we have saved quite a bit of money thanks to the student cards.

We grab our tickets and race to the door. We ask the ticket collector where the nearest toilets are and we are shown the way. After peeing, we realise we are at the Palace of Knights.

We go camera crazy and take photos of everything in the palace. We have photo's of the walls, floors and practically the falling roof. Wandering through this palace, we come across this:

I'm quite impressed with it so I decide to take a photo of it even though there's a huge sign at the door saying "No flash photography". They even have staff sitting there to monitor this. While the staff member isn't in the room, I pull out my camera and take a snap shot of it. This is when I get busted. The woman tells me I can't take any photos. I agree practically rolling my eyes at her. I like to see her stop me. I've travelled from the other side of the world for this, If I want a photo I'll get a fucken photo alright!

The Palace of Knights takes it toll, when we race outside and plant ourselves on some stones to relax. We discuss who is postcard worthy, when we decide we should continue exploring. We stroll around the Old town when we walk past a bunch of asians arguing about something. They are sitting at a resturant practically ready to rip each other apart. It's a huge commotion and I have no idea whats happening. Finally I find out that they are complaining because they paid $270 for lunch between the 4 of them. I have no idea what they ate but for $270 I could have eaten half of Australia. We assume they ordered seafood and got ripped off - Suckers!

We laugh at their situation and realise we are not the only two idiots getting ripped off. This is when we find a clock tower. We ask how much it is to climb the bloody thing. The girl states 5 Euros and we can't run away fast enough. 5 whole Euro's to climb some little tower. As you all know we don't stick to our decisions. Of course we ended up the tower and 5 Euros shorter.

Now climbing this tower was hell. I think its the fact I haven't been to the gym for a few months. I was searching for air in there. We managed to climb a few flights of stairs which look like they were ready to fall apart. Picture this - old rotten wooden stairs that kept squeaking every step we took. I'm suprised the thing didn't collapse on us knowing our luck. A few flights up, we stop to catch our breathe. Thank god we don't smoke, this would be twice as hard.

We finally approach the top when my head is touching the roof. There was another 2 people at the top who understood what we went through to get to the top. The top was so small that 4 people up there filled the space. The two decided to head down and we watched as going down the stairs was an accident waiting to happen.

We both pulled out our cameras as you would and took some panaramic shots of the city. Now this was worth the 5 Euros. After our photo shoot, we panic at the thought of going down theses stairs. They are so tiny and steep that we can easly fall through. Note the Turkish Mosque.

After much discussion and abusing one another for coming up here, we make it to the ground safely. We rush out to the garden bar to claim our free drink. This is when we notice that the bar tender has a hot ass. We did what anyone would do. We got a photo of it. I'm so proud of this.

Leaving the sexy ass behind, we continue our journey through Old town. I think we walked around and around for quite a while when we discovered another jewellery shop. I went crazy as I spotted a silver Greek bracelet. I wanted this bracelet the minute I saw it. Apparently it's a greek design. I have only seen it in Greece.

When we asked for a price she told us $35 Euros. We both practically collapsed. Holding tightly to the bracelet I was being forced to leave the store as I was considering paying $70 AU for a silver bracelet. Glueing my feet to the ground we start the bargaining process. This is when I blurt out that i'm not paying for it and its atually a birthday present for me. So she turns to nagasaki and demands why i'm not worth $35 Euros as its a birthday present. I can't remember what the conversation consist of but apparently I wasn't worth $35 Euro's. I was dragged out of the store like a little kid being dragged out of a candy shop.

I wanted the bracelet, however we decided to shop around for a cheaper price. After 15 shops we headed back to the bitch to buy it. Only one problem, we caused a scene in there stating that I wasn't paying for it so now I couldnt pay for it. So we pull over near the shop and I shove 50 Euros into nagasaki's hand and we storm into the store demanding my bracelet. This is when the woman decides to make a suggestion that I shouldnt buy the shiny one. She shows me a similar one and I'm instantly talked into it. We pay her the money, wander out and realised we wasted an hour shopping for a bracelet that I didn't end up buying. The design was quite similar to the one I brought. This reminds me did I get my 15 Euros back?

Continuing our walk, where I was nearly run over by a bike we decide to eat lunch or a snack more like it. God didn't we just have moussaka? Oh wait that was breakfast. I forgot we arrived in Rhodes at like 9am. We search for a resturant that isn't too expensive. We some how end up getting a yero's plate for $15.70 Euros. It was a satisfying meal for a reasonable price.

In search of the Turkish Palace...

I'm not sure what the history of Rhodes is (Maybe I should read the book I brought) but some say it was apart of Turkey. Hence the Turkish Palace and Mosque on the island. Reading the map we decide to head over and find this Turkish Palace. Now how hard can it be locating a Turkish Palace in Old town? To my amusment VERY! There are hardly any street names and the ones there are practically ignored. The maps arent accurate what so ever.

While searching around we spot a woman working in a cafe. Feeling adventurous I head over to ask her for directions. I approach her and ask where the turkish palace is pointing on the map. This is when I try my best not to laugh in her face.

The woman stands in front of me going "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, ummmmmmmm, ahhhhhhhhh, errrrrrrrrrrrrr, mmmmmmmmmmmm"....

This continues for like 30 seconds and I'm trying so fuckin hard not to burst out laughing. Its like this woman is having an orgasium. I simply ask for a palace and she starts breathing heavely. This was the weirdest moment.

I notice from the corner of my eye that I'm not the only one that thinks this is weird as my picture with her is being taken. Finally she comes to a conclusion and says " I don't understand". Like what the hell? She spent 30 seconds acting like she knew what I was saying to her and then blurts out that she doesnt know what the hell I am on about. I was ready to smack her across the face for wasting my time. What the hell did she think we were doing? Having sex? All that umm'ing and ahh'ing. I repeat I attract the FREAKS!!!

After the humming bitch we walk up and down the same street looking for this Turkish Palace. According to the map the palace should be here. This is when we look up and notice that the building on top of us should be the Turkish palace.

We assume this is the Turkish Palace and take several shots of it. We are too tired and can't be fucked arguing over it. At this point I need to pee again. We rush all over the Old town to locate a toilet. Finally we ask a waiter standing outside of his resturant if I can use his toilet. He grants me permession and I race in to find a queue. Bloody hell!

It's been a long 7 hours since leaving the hotel this morning and we both can't feel our feet anymore. We decide to head back to the hotel with one major problem. We have no idea how to get back. Maps come out but the bigger drama is locating an exit from in here. Its like a giant maze here. Once your in, your trapped!

After many attempts we realise that we have taken several wrong exits, so its back to the drawing board. At one stage we consider taking a cab back but then continue walking without answering each other. What ever happens, happens. We enter the Old town again to search for our exit door. This then leads us to another exit which we take to only see 4 dogs having an orgy. What does one do? We start filming the process. Great now we have dog porn. Who fuckin whats dog porn for crying out loud?

We soon realise we have lost our way to the hotel, when we stop to ask some cop for directions. This sexy beast gives us some direction and we wander off. Along the way we stop for a siesta. We make phone calls and confuse which street leads back to the hotel. By this time we have been walking for almost 8 hours.


We continue walking when it hits me that we are going in the wrong direction so I insist on going back. We walk back for like 10 minutes when we realise we were actually going in the right direction, so we turn back. We soon realise that we are on the right path but we are both ready to collapse.

We soon spot our hotel and from happiness we try to race into the hotel. We storm into the hotel lobby only to realise we are in the wrong hotel. We don't know whether to laugh or cry. We leave the hotel lobby only to discover we have another 2 blocks to walk.

Thoses 2 blocks were the longest walk of my life. We stand outside our hotel and agree this was the one, so we race up to reception. The woman from this morning is standing there. We demand our keys and air-con. She informs us that someone has gone up to our room to check out the air-con. Wait for this! She tells us that the reason our air-con wasn't working was because the main lamp wasn't on. Who neeeds a lamp on for an air-con to work.

Were too tried to argue so we grab our keys and remote and head into the lift. In the lift we realise we have to sleep with the fucken lamp on all night. Like what the fuck? I can't even sleep with my computer light on. If we want the bloody air-con to work the lamp has to be on.

We then question whether we should ask for a refund if we can't get the bloody air-con working. I question whether we can get a refund or not. This is when all of a sudden some inconsiderate person screams her lungs out as if someone is stabbing every part of body " If that bitch doesn't refund our aircon I will rip her throat out". I don't know if Im scared or excited. At that stage the elevator doors had open and the 2 people standing there looked at us if we were some kind of axe murderer's.

We storm out of the lift holding onto our laughter until the doors close. Finally we have a minor laughing attack before heading back down to the reception bitch. We wanted to ensure that we have to have the bloody lamp on in order for the air-con to work. We got told that, we have to have the lamp on and that she would get an electrian to check it out tomorrow.


Exhausted from the day, we storm off without saying a word to her back to our room. We sit in the room arguing why why we didn't catch a cab back to the hotel. Some things go unspoken.

We turn every fuckin light and air-con on and settle into bed for a nap.